i had a post all ready to go for today’s kick off to grief week. then i got word saturday night that a dear sweet friend connected to the refuge, who we have journeyed with for the past 8+ years since she was in high school, died suddenly in a tragic & avoidable car accident. my heart is so tired and i just wasn’t ready to write another post about pericardiums or open broken hearts.
there’s no way i can post this week about church grief. it’s just not the time. i’ll save it for when i come back september 1st and am going to sign off today for the next 2+ months. there’s plenty to read around here (5+ years worth!). i was already going to be off for july & august and am just starting a week earlier. i need to catch my breath in all kinds of ways and focus on what’s right in front of me.
in times of trouble, i always cling to this part of psalm 9–“but God will never forget the needy; the hope of the afflicted will never perish” (v.19).
i am glad God doesn’t forget us, and that try as this world may, it can’t kill our hope.
it’s also why i believe in every fiber of my being that we need safe communities that can hold the space for the realities of real life-–who can be a refuge in times of trouble, who are the weird havens that people keep running back to over the course of years & years, who never give up on hope & possibility & healing for people despite the obstacles.
i can’t tell you how much respect i have for my fellow co-pastors who, when i introduced them to my friend years ago, signed on for the long haul with her, too. they are the real freaking deal, full of so much compassion and heart. i can’t tell you how much respect i have for my other refuge friends who love so well, so freely (the refuge kids, too). and i can’t tell you how grateful i am that despite all of the shifts i’ve had in my faith, that i still have Hope.
true and deep hope.
hope that God is with us in every $*@^&!&!!& mess.
hope that he’ll never ever ever give up on us no matter how many times we fall.
hope that every bit of Christ’s love & dignity & kindness & compassion & grace that gets extended this side of heaven is worth it.
hope that despite the pain of this life there’s so much beauty and light and goodness in it, too.
my friend whose life was too short embodied this kind of hope. my community does, too.
so, my dear friends, i’ll miss you here for the rest of the summer and extra appreciate your prayers & love. i know so many of you are fighting your own battles and have aching hearts right now for different reasons. you’re trying to hold on to Hope, too.
maybe that’s what we all have in common.
it’s worth holding on to.
see you soon.
with love, kathy
30 Comments
Amen. Sorry to hear that about your freind.
thanks, adam.
Hope the book is going well.
Thank you, Kathy, for your beautiful non-post post!
🙂
Yes, so sorry to hear of still another sorrow in your life. Rest. Heal. Be.
You are loved more than you can imagine!
thanks, sheila. i appreciate your love and friendship so much.
Rest. Grieve. Write your book. Be with your family. Take care of yourself. and just be…with Jesus.
thanks, missy. that’s what i did!
and tried to play with marty and john when we could 🙂
may you grieve deeply and well. the Man of sorrows aquainted with grief will be carrying you along that winding pathway …
thank you linda. i appreciate your heart and presence here.
Praying for you and your friends family in your loss.
thanks, esther!
So sorry to hear about this. Our thoughts and prayers are with all of you. Do I know her?
you didn’t meet her when you were visiting, but you would have loved her. she was a ton of fun.
Sweet sister, Grief Week was just not the way you thought it would be … Grief being a wild and uncontrollable thing…. Your purple abbess needed to hear these purple words today. Our Abba is always looking out for our best interest, even in the darkness of death. The severe mercy strikes again…. Be blessed, even as you are a blessing….
grateful for your love and prayers from afar…
In your corner, holding you up, on you team always. Your grace and hope even in deep deep pain is beautiful and inspiring. Going to live this one life in a more meaningful way, because of you. Like her, your love has made so much more tolerable and more possible to follow the ways of Jesus. xoxoxoxo
thanks dear friend, you are such a wonderful teammate
So hard, dear Kathy. And I am sorry. Praying your time away is truly restful and restorative. You’ll be missed – but we’ll glad to see you whenever you find your way back to this space.
thanks pastor diana, i appreciate your prayers
Let the tears fall and the sobs shake. I am so sorry. Thank you for caring, for reaching out to your friend, for being part of her life.
thank you for your kind words.
I’m so sorry hear such tragic news.
I hope you find your time away refreshing and soul soothing.
thanks erin. even though it was tumultuous in different ways, it was really good for my soul, too!
Kathy – I am glad that you are taking some time to let your heart heal because we need you around here.
thanks glenn. it was a nice break and i had a lot of great time with my family over the summer out on the water.
Sorry to hear about this, you, your family and the refuge are in our thoughts and prayers. grace&peace. Stuart.
thanks stuart, i know you know how hard these kinds of things are. hope we get to catch up soon! would love to hear what’s happening with you guys.