Today is Holy Saturday, the day between the death of Jesus and the resurrection. It’s the day that most of us want to skip over, the part that so rarely gets acknowledged, especially on a day of easter egg hunts and shining blue skies. I originally posted this 7 years ago (crazy how fast time […]
Read Morefriends-of-faith-shifters: things that help, things that hurt
Some things I originally wrote made it into Faith Shift, and some things didn’t. After multiple conversations in the past several weeks, I thought I’d share some of the on-the-cutting-room-floor pieces of this part of the Appendix to offer some possibilities for those who have friends or family members who are shifting in their faith […]
Read Morelifting heads, straightening backs.
Sometimes I get calls from women asking for help to get out of an abusive relationship. Skittish, scared, and filled with shame, they reach out and share their story. It’s so brave. Some are rich, some are poor. Some are educated, others have never graduated from high school. Some have kids while others don’t. Some […]
Read Moreso much beauty despite the thorns.
Well, that was kind of wild. My little post on narcissism and the church was the #2 most-hit blog post in carnival history (#1 is ex-good-christian-women, ha ha). I am so glad because it means that people’s eyes are being opened to this issue in church culture. Hopefully we will actually let what we see guide […]
Read Morea thing or two about narcissism (+ church).
For a lot of years now I have been journeying with a lot of women who have been in marriages or relationships with narcissists. I’m not talking about plain old self-absorbedness, of which we all have a touch of in different ways. I’m talking about something far more insidious and confusing, too–people with true blue […]
Read Morein my living room: choices
One of my favorite times of the week is our Wednesday House of Refuge group that gathers at our house. A fun, open group, it’s been going since the beginning of The Refuge, almost 9 years now, and it’s always one of the most interesting times of my week. We have a potluck, and it’s […]
Read Moreredeeming old words (like "redeem")
Oh, I’d love to know how many of you cringed when you read the word “redeem”? It seems like an additional hard part about some of our faith shifts is that particular words we used to love and appreciate have become ones we begin to avoid or cause us to twinge. For all kinds of reasons, […]
Read Moreoutsiders.
One of the things that has been the hardest about shifting faith is moving from being an “insider” to an “outsider.” I have always been one of those people who looks like an insider, like someone who fits in. The truth is that underneath a lot of that has been a prevailing feeling that somehow, […]
Read Morewhen christmas is hard.
Oh, this time of year! Some people love it, some people hate it. There are so many things tied to the time from Thanksgiving to not just Christmas but also the start of a new year. It brings to light the reality of losses, financial pressures, broken relationships, shame, family brokenness or non-existedness, faith shifts, […]
Read Morerace & ferguson & what might be swirling around in our heads and hearts
It’s been an interesting paradox of a Thanksgiving week. The joy of having our kids all home for the holiday and not wanting to think of anything other than being together, contrasted with the reality of the painful events in Ferguson and what it means for all of us. As a white woman of […]
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